Ask Me No Questions, I’ll Tell You No Lies: Face and Privacy Management Implications in Addiction-Related Disclosures

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For most people, sexual activity is a normal and healthy part of intimate romantic relationships. However, for some, sexual behaviors can become problematic to the extent their behaviors begin to impair or disrupt critical aspects of effective functioning. The inability

For most people, sexual activity is a normal and healthy part of intimate romantic relationships. However, for some, sexual behaviors can become problematic to the extent their behaviors begin to impair or disrupt critical aspects of effective functioning. The inability to control problematic sexual behavior is among the most prominent traits for diagnosing compulsive sexual behavior or what is commonly referred to as sex addiction. Sex addicts in committed romantic relationships routinely engage in secrecy and deception as a maladaptive means to cope with the shame and guilt associated with such severe relational transgressions. Although ongoing disclosures with one’s dyadic partner regarding addiction-related struggles may be a healthy exercise in transparency and accountability, such honest disclosures risk re-injuring the transgressed partner while simultaneously upending the recovering addict’s attempt to restore face. Hence, recovering sex addicts who wish to repair their blighted dyadic relationships must carefully navigate self-disclosure and privacy implications as they attempt to restore themselves and their intimate relationships. Accordingly, this dissertation utilizes thematic analysis to explore the face and privacy implications surrounding addiction-related disclosures (ARD) in committed dyadic relationships. This qualitative study conducted semi-structured interviews with 14 recovering sex addicts attending 12-step Sex Addicts Anonymous groups. Key findings from this study suggest a relationship between recovery progress and how ARD are comprised, articulated, and interpreted by dyadic partners. Additionally, this study found that ARD, although damaging, largely did not result in relationship termination. Rather, relationships impacted by such disclosures simultaneously experienced two disparate relationship stages of bonding and stagnating. Finally, this study suggests that the reverberation of salacious ARD across the romantic dyad fundamentally upends the transgressor’s positive face. Such severe face damage was found to attenuate participants’ ability to regulate privacy boundaries with their partners.